Please Wear Headphones
1
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This is what happens when I feel the breesed. It's like, a wind in my hair pieces, but a bad one. A shock in my noodles, but a bad one. A crystalline tear. How do I zip these things closed. How do I empty the trash. There is no right click there is no terminal. Just me.
2
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My friends can't stop going to work. They just keep going. I just keep going. We are going, together, at different times, places, but we are going.
Why don't we zoom the FUCK into the Ice Volcano and find it there, come along folks!!!!!!!
3
When ice gets compressed at the bottom of a glacier it gets blue. We’re inside the Ice Volcano……… imagine a weird pearl being put into the hollow of your ear, sitting like the most perfectly shaped earbud, a little kidney nut.
—BE CAREFUL, don’t let it fall out.
4
“Hello folks, we’re getting an InSide look at the workings of our solary system. Look closely… here you see how the Tranzitional Soft Node spits out the light that reaches the crystals, each crystal continuously encased by stunge oil, that is, the oil that is created by the process of joining the salty tears and oxygen and borax and then let to sit in vats deep underground with misted grubby dirt warmed by the Earth’s core in order to turn into some sort of molasses and then sifted through a burlap-silk hybrid cloth bag and squeezed out with a ply of thick ancient wood like a 3 Ez Plastic Tube Squeezer Toothpaste Dispenser Holder Rolling Bathroom Extract Assorted colors. I say continuous because the stunge oil infinitely repeats the process of drying around the crystal, hardening, cracking, and falling into the pit of Dead and Dry Earth, shot to the core to keep the flame a-goin’…”.
5
“Anyway, so the stunge oil falls off and the small puff, or maybe not puff maybe more like, say, grunt, a grunt of force. That force lights the crystals up for just a second and provides OurKind with energy! The energy is Tranzitional, or Tranz energy, so it can be turned into any sort of energy in particular back at the surface. This process is integral to our survival. The crystals must be replaced every millionth year, or in crystal years, every god damn second! Can you believe that? Time is such a funny thing. Let’s move on, shall we?”
6
you hear pounding bass, what’s this, YOU’RE DANCING!!!
“So here we are in the Puttroom. It ends up acting as the stomach, so to say, of this massive underground system we’ve got goin on. Things get churned and bupped’n’gutted here. This endless process,--have I said that already? Hahaha, what can I say, everything is infinity down here! So this endless process is what powers the Tranzitional Soft Node, or lets just say TSN for short. We throw our dead here after we’ve browned them into a sort of mushroomy consistency, firm but tender/gummy/bouncy. All those different beats you hear are the bodies bouncing around and hitting the edges and hitting each other. The more bumps the better. If we don’t have enough dead people fuel, we’ll sometimes drop in the shuck filter. It’s basically a layered sheet of welded pasture stone, reformed to act as pinball bumpers, or obstacles in a pacer bowl, or sand through mesh, or bounce house…”
“…Remember lazer tag? Was there ever a bounce house version? Kinda like that!”
7
bodies are jiggling, not like jello, more like… mushroom… if you look at the fluid long enough you feel like you can see it changing and buzzing and flattening and stretching but it’s weird, because it's fluid, but I guess it’s like when you are making slime and the mass starts forming. It’s that but going back and forth and never fully hardening.
Slime back n forth forever.
You close your eyes…
8
you had the day off today, and you unchecked all of your stimularms considering it’s been a while since you took a breather and didn’t regulate your every move. So when you start to fall asleep on your tour, the stimularm for waking you back up doesn’t, but you have your ASMR implant that activates upon sensing a tired body trying to sleep. You could have not wanted to sleep.
You hear a rainstorm in your head, and it’s just a tad bit too crunchy-thin so you turn up the bass and feel the sounds welling up and popping like meaty bubbles surround sound thunderstorm. Maybe you’re tired of this one. Maybe you need to save money for a more randomized (naturalized?) one, since you’ve memorized the seams between the loop. But what ppl don’t know is that it’s kinda nice to be able to identify the loop, it doesn’t really ruin it, it’s like, anticipating the seam maybe kind of is annoying but you end up counting them or thinking about them and then that just sets you off into some kind of thought loop that is repetitive enough but also grows enough new veins and so then its both active enough and cyclical enough to just… yknow… it just gets me. Like it ends up doing its job anyway. I don’t think I need to buy a new one. This is fine… I’ll probably end up thinking the same thing next time but maybe I can turn on the autopilot… or maybe there’s something I haven’t noticed...
10
“I can describe to you what its like. Its like, basically, you whisper into the machine and it tells you what you were
“ And I was winking at him, and he looked as if he wasn’t sure, so I… just pushed the gun in through the socket and it sort of gulped it down, tight wrapping on text, text being gun, and the crisp banana wax layers of light really split through each little indent on this gun in RealTime and it could
“I don’t know if I can go back… It’s been really tiring and they constantly tell me I’ve done the wrong thing so as to fuck with my guilt receptors because they know that I’ve never taken one of these jobs before.
“Do they split the cake down the middle? Oil the seeches? Enlarge every 3D ball of tiny air living in the molten batter… I mean like… SEEthing at the bell
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11
I crack my head on the pavement. There is no pavement. I really just heard someone whisper my name…hey 000… hey 000…
12
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I found you one time near a ditch, tucked into the corner of a giant abandoned building embedded into huge shitty molding boulders, probably the leftovers of a fake zoo setup, and it was about 20 miles from anything. I was walking because I can’t move any otherwise. I had to go to work. I hadn’t seen anyone on the way before.
13
u were recording some creek noises into the tip of your pinky nail, saved and ready to be turned into a loop with the others. Which recipe will u be providing it for? Creek/Noise/Stuffing/Tuft layered soundscape Perfect for Water Table and Inward Love. The sign of the water table basically means you want to inhale the wetness of others and solidify it, construct it, bend it at right angles, fill with wood turned sandy mud, with clay, a common mixture around children’s carineums*… when their psyches leak out it ends up being a mixture of syrupy-y and mercury-y… like a syrup that balls up at the touch of less porous surfaces but will really fill that cake the fuck up in those cake holes.
14
anyway that’s what I was thinking. And you were a little surprised and suddenly your recording device had to reset its title after analyzing the sounds and finally decide upon ‘faraway walking/water marsh/lapping shitty mold boulders/gasp’, which is great for the more expensive crowd. I know because you read it aloud after realizing what had happened. I had passed you by about a mile by now and you were probably still at the boulder water, sucking up your bittersweetness to save for a salve.
A salve you could sell on the side.
15
I tried looking up that title in the network of asmr videos, but couldn’t find it.
Every time I dreamt of you that night I kept imagining you as all the phones I’ve ever had.
